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Films are out today. Some are good, some are bad and some you will see regardless.

Iron Man 2
They say it’s not as good as the first and that it can be slow and has too many characters. But does it matter? Everyone will see it and probably enjoy themselves. The less I hear about these after the credit scenes the better though; if it were that good or indeed important to the plot they’d put it in the movie.

The Disappearance of Alice Creed
Gemma Arterton gets kidnapped in a British film with only three actors in it. This looks like it might be OK though I think they’ve ruined it by constantly making a point that it is “twisty” and there is a “plot twist”. You have to assume Arterton’s character is in on it or something. If you’ve missed the word “twist” on the promotional stuff then I have just ruined it for you. Twist.

The Last Song
Miley Cyrus tries to get all serious about acting and will undoubtedly fail. The film is supposed to be terrible and looks set to tug on your heart strings so hard they’ll probably snap rather than get you weeping. Cyrus fans will find it hard to resist though they’d be better off playing the trailer on loop with the soundtrack playing in the background.

There are also a lot of smaller films on limited release that no one has ever heard of including 24 City, A Boy Called Dad, Gentlemen Broncos, Housefull, The Milk of Sorrow, Revanche and Valhalla Rising. If you have heard of these and/or go and see one you get 10 Mild Concern arty cinema points.

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It’s official, Bill Condon has agreed to direct the two part finale to the Twilight saga Breaking Dawn.  Let’s see what everyone is saying about that…

Erik Feig from Summit Entertainment says: “Bringing Stephenie Meyer’s Breaking Dawn to the screen requires a graceful and intelligent hand and we believe Bill Condon is exactly the right steward, having shown equal and abundant talents of immense creativity and subtle sensitivity”

Translation: “Making Stephenie Meyer’s Breaking Dawn watchable requires someone who has seen a film before and possibly read the book, we believe Bill Condon is right for the job having totally won an Oscar and said he had heard of the films.”

Author Stephenie Meyer says: “I’m so thrilled that Bill wants to work with us. I think he’s going to be a great fit, and I’m excited to see what he does with the material.”

Translation: “I’m frankly amazed we managed to get him to work with us. I’m excited to see if he can make this book into a film less ridiculous that the rest.”

Bill Condon says: “I’m very excited to get the chance to bring the climax of this saga to life on-screen. As fans of the series know, this is a one-of-a-kind book – and we’re hoping to create an equally unique cinematic experience”

Translation: “I’m very excited to get a job as I haven’t really worked much since the Oscar. I really hope to distance this film from the other terrible predecessors and create a unique cinematic experience.”

What has Condon been doing since Dreamgirls?

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I’ve said before that I don’t like 3D in a lot of circumstances, horror films being a major exception. When I heard yesterday that The Ring 3 would be in 3D I got a little bit excited.

3D is all about breaking down the barrier between the viewer and the film that the silver screen puts up, it should make you feel like what is happening onscreen could actually physically affect you. With a big 3D action sequence the camera angle changes so much and the 3D is so minimal it’s clear you’re not in the same reality as the film.

When a scene is framed perfectly, as in Disney World’s Honey I Shrunk the Audience, the 3D is all that more convincing. I think I’ve gone off topic…. The Ring is most famous for having a demon child, Samara, crawl out of the TV to kill her victims, what better use for 3D is there? If Samara were to appear to be crawling out of the cinema screen towards me I think I’d have a minor heart attack.

Brilliant!

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Back with all the Avengers, Iron Man and  Captain America madness I mentioned Edgar Wright’s long delayed Antman project which is now set to begin pre-production in early 2011. The film would then be set to be released after The Avengers meaning that Antman will not debut in his own feature film.

It seems I was right about why Edgar Wright met with Joss Whedon as they were probably discussing how they wanted the character written.

All this would be much more exciting if I had the faintest idea who half of these superheroes were. At least I love the writer/directors involved.

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Cemetery Junction is a bit of an odd bird and I’m not quite sure how to review it. Genre-wise it is definitely a mix between comedy and drama, the comedy elements providing a welcome release from the occasionally bleak themes in the film.

Cemetery Junction looks down on everyday small town life and the small cruelties within families while inspiring escapism and the desire for getting something more out of life. It does so with some truly affecting moments and is interspersed with moments of real laugh out loud delight. The film is Gervais light, though perhaps not light enough as some of the dialogue is jarringly Ricky-esque and his character’s few brief appearances didn’t sit well with the rest of the film.

Though its story is a simple one I enjoyed watching it unfold; the film felt warm and real. The lead, Christian Cooke, easily draws you in with the silent horror he feels at the world he lives in and the soundtrack made me instantly nostalgic for a time I never lived in. In fact Cooke really impressed, especially for someone whose CV so far includes Echo Beach, Demons and Trinity, all bad ITV shows.

Cemetery Junction is certainly not a high concept film and doesn’t take you anywhere you wouldn’t expect but is an enjoyable experience and different to most modern British films. Instead it had the scent of older UK cinema and I can’t help but imagine that it would have starred a young Michael Cane if made at the time it was set.

Ultimately I think I could happily watch Cemetery Junction again, and not just to see the lovely Felicity Jones once more.

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