Out Now – 8th November 2013


Come on guys, I think you’ve heard of this film by now; a taut space drama starring Sandra Bullock and George Clooney in which astronauts find themselves adrift in space. The 3D is so good even Mark Kermode recommends you don the oversized glasses and the film promises to have lengthy single shot scenes to rival Alfonso Cuarón’s previous work in Children of Men. All this and the film is only 90 minutes long, how refreshing. I’m so excited I could vomit.

Seduced and Abandoned
Documentary looking at the way in which films are financed as filmmaker James Toback and Alec Baldwin attend Cannes to seek funding for a potentially fictional project entitled Last Tango in Tikrit. Supposedly an amusing look at the bizarre way films actually get made. Reviews are good, not Gravity good but good nonetheless, and with Baldwin involved you never know when he’ll be caught off guard and spew homophobic slurs. FUN!

Love Tomorrow
“After an ex-ballet dancer’s life is turned upside down after receiving devastating news, a chance encounter with a charismatic dancer marks the start to a fragile friendship that might turn into something more profound.” No offense to any of my friends but none of my friendships have ever gotten close to becoming profound and frankly the whole idea sounds a little dull. The minute a friend gets profound just give them a quick slap and it should clear up soon enough. You’ll be back to running around town giggling at tourists in no time.

How to Survive a Plague
Being flippant about the AIDs crisis seems a bad idea so instead let me say that this film on the subject is “an intimate and personal documentary about a global tragedy that will give you hope in the strength of the combined human spirit just as much as it crushes your belief in humanity.” This and other awkwardly sincere phrases can be found in my review.

Behzat Ç. Ankara yaniyor
“Behzat Ç.’nin yoklu?unda Cinayet Büronun ba??na Himmet ad?nda bir Ba?komiser atanm??t?r. ?çi?leri Bakan?n?n öldürülmesi te?kilatta büyük bir çalkant?ya yol aç?nca Himmet de bunu kendi aç?s?ndan bir f?rsata dönü?türmeye karar verir ve ekibini Terörle Mücadeleye yard?mc? olmaya yönlendirir.” Ekibini indeed.

Hükümet kadin 2
I assume this is a sequel to Hükümet kadin. Let’s be straight with each other now; you’re going to see Gravity this weekend and if you’re avoiding the hype maybe see Seduced and Abandoned instead. The sequel to a Turkish film you haven’t seen that is only showing in four cinemas is not going to be troubling you this evening. Prove me wrong. I dare you.