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Give me an evening with nothing to do and the new teaser trailer for Skyfall, James Bond’s 23rd outing, and naturally animated .gifs and videos get made. It is nature’s way. Before indulging me familiarise yourself with the teaser below:

What is the first thing that springs to mind upon watching this trailer? What recent cultural phenomenon has clearly influenced the latest James Bond film? Coronation Street of course! The Weatherfield tram crash has been recreated by Skyfall‘s director Sam Mendes using a tube train and it almost looks as good as the stunt created on an ITV1 budget. If you need side by side animated .gif comparison we have you covered:

The second thing my brain thought upon seeing this teaser was that it simply isn’t centred around Judi Dench enough. I have made my expectations for Skyfall pretty clear and expect much more Dench in the finished film. I have tweaked the trailer a little to better reflect what I hope the final film will be like.

Who doesn’t prefer Judi Dench looking at things to Daniel Craig running around and shooting things? Oh.

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While we are clearly all film connoisseurs here at Mild Concern and watch all films regardless of their outward appearance and marketing, sometimes seeing a certain bunch of actors in a trailer gets me all excited. (see Best Exotic Marigold Hotel)

To give you an insight into how my brain reacts to this sort of trailer, and the general inane chatter I have to put up with all day long from inside my own head, I have broken down my thought process while watching the trailer for Hyde Park on Hudson, embedded below.

My reaction to the trailer for Hyde Park on Hudson can be broken down as follows:

0:12 – Laura Linney! She’s normally really good in things (and I once saw her making out in Piccadilly Circus). Let’s hope this isn’t one of her annoying roles.
0:16 – Who’s that? I don’t recognise the voice.
0:20 – Bill Murray! I love him in every single film he’s done.
0:26 – Wow, he really doesn’t sound like Bill Murray. I will hopefully get over this soon.
0:40 – Was that Olivia Colman? It probably wasn’t but wouldn’t it be great if it was?
0:49 – King of England? I guess this is King Colin Firth. This is what you get for choosing Geography over History.
0:56 – Olivia Williams too! She was great even in Dollhouse.
1:00 – Nice fake teeth you’re wearing Olivia Williams.
1:04 – It certainly sounds like Olivia Colman. (At this point I start to look up the film on IMDb)
1:14 – It is Olivia Colman. I love Olivia Colman! (And IMDb gets closed)
1:25 – Fantastic awkward wave, very Roger & Val.
1:36 – I like cocktails.
1:40 – “Based on True Events” means I might actually learn something about history. Fantastic.
2:08 – I wonder what Bill Murray was Oscar nominated for?*
2:10 – Bill Murray and Olivia Colman in the same car. Amazing.
2:12 – I wonder what Laura Linney was Oscar nominated for? Presumably not Love Actually.**
2:23 – Excellent use of the film’s title in dialogue. Kudos.
2:29 – When is soon?

* Lost in Translation, of course.
** The Savages, Kinsey and You Can Count on Me. Steady on Linney.

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The Raid
A SWAT team faces off against a mobster’s army of thugs in a tower block. This film is getting a huge amount of buzz and looks to be filled wall to wall with ridiculous action of the highest quality. Probably best to avoid if you are of a delicate disposition. Take your inhaler.

2 Days in New York
In this sequel to 2 Days in Paris the culture clash has moved to New York and Adam Goldberg has been swapped for Chris Rock. If there’s anyone who thrives in romantic comedy dramas set over a specific short time frame it is Julie Delphy.

The Source (limited release)
Women in a small village go on sex strike to encourage their men to fetch water from a distant well. The men react badly rather than doing the sensible thing and simply moving closer to the well and/or withholding their DIY skills to further enforce gender stereotypes.

Even the Rain (limited release)
Set around the production of a film about Christopher Columbus as it is disrupted by protests surrounding the privatisation of the local water supply. Not exactly the most enticing of plots and there’s not even any sex or violence, just some strong language.

The Life and Death of Colonel Blimp (limited release)
Re-release of 1940s drama about, well… the life and death of Colonel Blimp.

If I Want to Whistle, I Whistle (limited release)
A teenager in prison finds love on the inside two weeks before his release. I suggest he shivs a guard to get his stay extended. Anything for love!

She Monkeys (limited release)
Two teenage girls with a fondness for equestrian vaulting share a crush and a relationship filled with physical and psychological challenges.

The Dictator
That scoundrel Sacha Baron Cohen is back with his fourth feature, the first to not feature a character from Da Ali G Show. This time Baron Cohen is playing Admiral General Aladeen, dictator of a fictional country called the Republic of Wadiya, who is summoned by the UN to discuss his nuclear program. Looking decidedly more scripted than his more recent work The Dictator appears on the surface to be easily the second best film Baron Cohen has made. Put that on your poster!

Matthew Bourne’s Swan Lake (limited release)
I’m told that Matthew Bourne’s re-interpretation of Swan Lake is a modern dance classic. I’m also told that dance is one of the few times that 3D really works. If “they” are to be believed then this 3D cinematic recording of the ballet is a must see, not least because you will finally understand Black Swan. I’m still scared of ballet, someone may have to hold my hand.

The Man with the Jazz Guitar (limited release)
“The delightful portrait of the fascinating 50s jazz musician and popular radio broadcaster, Ken Sykora, told through his vast archive of sound recordings and memorabilia.” As usual with these films I have no idea who Ken Sykora is.