All Stars
British family comedy about some of those short young people putting on a dance show to save their youth center which is being threatened with closure. The cast includes the likes of the aggressively camp John Barrowman and Kimberley Walsh (from Girls Aloud, attractive but not in the sense that you’re actually attracted to her, you know the one).
21 & Over
Teen comedy centered around a wild night of drinking as a medical student celebrates his 21st birthday. It’s worth noting that a 21st birthday in America, where the film is set, is a big deal because this is the legal drinking age. This side of the Atlantic of course we’ve all been legally drinking for three years at this point and our livers have long since shrivelled and died.
Dead Man Down
A man seeking retribution falls for a woman seeking retribution. Together they presumably find the retribution they seek and spend the rest of their time together racked with guilt and unable to regain the revenge fuelled passion their relationship was built on, though I doubt the film covers that bit.
Chimpanzee
If Disney made nature documentaries they would probably be about an orphan chimpanzee who is adopted by a full-grown male of no relation and would be narrated by Tim Allan. They’d probably call it something simply like Chimpanzee and release it in early May.
I’m So Excited (limited release)
Pedro Almodóvar normally makes very serious Spanish films in which at least one person suffers some sort of sexual assault. His films are good but not always easy to watch. As such it is a pleasant surprise for him to make a sex comedy that Ollie described as “one of the most colourful and camp films of 2013″.
Gimme the Loot (limited release)
“When their latest work is buffed by a rival crew, two determined graffiti writers embark on an elaborate plan to bomb the ultimate location: the New York Mets’ Home Run Apple.” To the Urban Dictionary!
Dragon (limited release)
“A sinful martial arts expert wants to start a new tranquil life, only to be hunted by a determined detective and his former master.” IMDb has a discussion thread complimenting the physics in the fight scenes. Good old internet.
The Eye of the Storm (limited release)
An ageing matriarch is a tyrant even as she lies in her deathbed while her two grown children visit in the hopes on securing their inheritance. Looks like someone is chasing the grey pound.
Shootout At Wadala (limited release)
Bollywood gangster film about a real life shoot out. Anyone who thinks Bollywood is all about light romantic films with high-pitched musical interludes will be surprised to learn that this is an 18 certificate and includes “strong bloody violence and a scene of sexual violence”. I’m guessing no dance routines but who knows.
Come Out and Play (limited release)
Horror film about an American couple holidaying on a remote island near Mexico who discover they are the only adults around. Because there’s nothing more horrific than other people’s unattended children when you’re on holiday.
It’s Such a Beautiful Day (ICA only)
“A bittersweet existential odyssey which takes in dead birds, big onions, lunchbox messages, trains, manatees, leaf-blowers and the eventual death and rebirth of the known universe” screening alongside director Don Hertzfeldt’s previous shorts. This is only screening at the Institute of Contemporary Arts so be warned.
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