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Puss in Boots
Antonio Banderas’ Puss in Boots gets a prequel to cover the time he spent before appearing in Shrek 2 in a film the critics say has, “an abundance of wit, visual sparkle, and effervescent charm.”

Another Earth (limited release)
Rhoda is involved in a fatal car crash when it is announced on the radio that a mirror version of Earth has been discovered approaching our planet. Struggling with the guilt of killing a mother and son in the crash, Rhoda becomes preoccupied with the idea of the second Earth on which exists an alternate version of herself, identical up to the point of discovery. Did her mirror self make the same mistake and cause an accident too? Cannot wait to see this one.

The Well Digger’s Daughter (limited release)
“A father in pre-WWII France is torn between his sense of honour and his deep love for his saintly daughter when she gets in trouble with the wealthy son of a shopkeeper.”

Mysteries of Lisbon (limited release)
“Follows a jealous countess, a wealthy businessman, and a young orphaned boy across Portugal, France, Italy and Brazil where they connect with a variety of mysterious individuals.” Lives up to the mysterious nature suggested by the title. With this being a Portuguese film the likelihood of us seeing this is dramatically increased; we have a track record.

A Very Harold & Kumar 3D Christmas (limited release)
Harold, Kumar and Neil Patrick Harris return in some kind of Christmas adventure involving weed, nudity and the wonderful abuse of 3D.

Barely Legal (limited release)
Another straight to video American film somehow creeps its way into UK cinemas. Three (female) best friends born on the same day try to lose their virginity at a joint 18th birthday party.

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New Year’s Eve
It’s amazing that a film with a cast consisting of at least 18 actors, many of which could almost be described as A-listers, includes not a single one at the top of their game right now. Instead we have a mix of TV actors trying to break out and former film stars struggling to remain relevant. Following on in a similar vein to the mind-numbing Valentine’s Day, this film follows a myriad of couples on New Year’s Eve. Tedious links will join the couples and in a similar way the audience will be united in an overwhelming sense of rage towards the film they are watching. A great date movie if you happen to be dating the criminally bland.

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The Thing
A prequel (not a remake) to the 1982 classic, we see just what went on in the Norwegian camp before it became the charred, bloody mess we saw in the original. Worth seeing for a bit of Mary Elizabeth Winstead and deciding whether CGI can match extreme puppetry.

Happy Feet Two
The original was an all-singing, all-dancing penguin adventure turned environmental message film. While Mumble struggled to sing and started a dancing craze amongst the penguins, his son struggles to dance. This plot reversal reminds me of The Little Mermaid II: Return to the Sea. Not that I’ve seen it. Obviously.

Hugo
“Set in 1930s Paris, an orphan who lives in the walls of a train station is wrapped up in a mystery involving his late father and an automaton.” I’m not sure either but this marks Scorsese’s debut into the world of 3D children’s films and has a message of preserving films. Curious.

The Big Year (limited release)
Steve Martin, Jack Black and Owen Wilson are rival bird watchers in this comedy we should already start trying to forget.

Romantics Anonymous (limited release)
Two highly emotional and pathologically timid French people fall in love in this quirky romantic comedy. Plenty of chocolate is involved. Amélie meets Chocolat.

Ghett’a Life (limited release)
“An “against the odds” action drama set in a politically turbulent inner city community of Kingston. Derrick, a determined inner city teenager realizes his dream of becoming a champion boxer despite a country, community and family conflicted by divisive political system.” Not another Cool Runnings then?

The Last Waltz (limited release)
Scorsese goes for a double with a re-release of this late-seventies documentary about the last concert of The Band.

We Have a Pope (limited release)
Italian comedy-drama in which a newly elected pope struggles to deal with the unexpected situation of being the pontiff with the help of his therapist.

Las Acacias (limited release)
This Spanish-language film has a synopsis on IMDb which I completely failed to understand. Summarise it for me and I’ll buy you a Curly Wurly.

Camp Hell (limited release)
Advertised as starring Jesse Eisenberg when in reality he only has a brief cameo, presumably filmed before he became famous. Eisenberg wants so little to do with this film he is suing the distributors.

Surviving Life (limited release)
Czech comedy mixing live action with cut-out animation using photographs, about a man living a double life in his dream. Like Goodnight Sweetheart but not nearly so bad.

Margaret (limited release)
Set for release over four years ago this film must have given up hope by now. Anna Paquin stars as a teenage girl worried she may have caused a bus accident. A cast including Matt Damon, Kieran Culkin, Allison Janney, Mark Ruffalo and Jean Reno make you wonder what held this film back for so long.

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That Girl in Yellow Boots (limited release)
With a Sunday release leaving one day in its opening weekend, this is one film not chasing box office success. A British woman goes to India in search of her father and has a traumatic (18 certificate rated) time going about it. As a Sunday treat, here’s a trailer:

Moneyball
It’s Oscar season! With this being a baseball movie I am at a loss to try to comprehend the plot. What I can say is that this film stars Brad Pitt, Jonah Hill, Robin Wright and Philip Seymour Hoffman and yet none of these are the most exciting cast member, that title belongs to Chris Pratt. Pratt is an amazing comedic actor, keep your eyeballs on him.

The Deep Blue Sea
Sadly not involving hyper-intelligent killer sharks. Instead a poorly reviewed romantic period drama starring Tom Hiddleston and Rachel Weisz.

50/50
To quote my rave review (cruelly left off the film’s poster): “In short, a moving and hilarious film about living with cancer. Who knew a Seth Rogan project would almost make me cry?” Fans of indie drama and broad comedy can unite and see who lasts the longest without crying.

My Week with Marilyn
Michelle Williams is Marilyn Monroe! Kenneth Branagh is Sir Laurence Olivier! Emma Watson is some random costume woman called Lucy! Eddie Redmayne is the lead! You know him! He was in an episode of Doctors eight years ago!

Dream House
Rachel Weisz (again) stars in this horror alongside her new husband Daniel Craig. Apparently this is the film where they moved from friends to friends with a serious commitment to one another, so there’s something to look out for if the plot is a little lack-lustre.

Take Shelter (limited release)
In my (mostly) rave review I used phrases like, “infinitely better than Evan Almighty“, “Shannon is brilliant”, “a clever, well told story” and “an enthralling watch and a great showcase for Michael Shannon”. Michael Shannon plays a man who thinks the world is going to end and then it either does or doesn’t. If your local cinema isn’t showing this film, move.

An African Election (limited release)
“An African Election is a political documentary that exposes the never-before-seen, nitty-gritty of political electioneering in Africa.”

Resistance (limited release)
“In 1944 a group of women in an isolated Welsh village wake up to discover all of their husbands have mysteriously vanished.” Oooh a thriller. Shame this will be overshadowed in this over-saturated week of releases. A cast of Iwan Rheon, Michael Sheen and Andrea Riseborough is worth leaving the house for.

We Were Here (limited release)
A moving look at the arrival and impact of AIDS in San Francisco. Sadly only showing at the ICA, why not work it into a trip to see where the Queen lives?

Revenge: A Love Story (limited release)
Quirky romantic comedy in which a man’s girlfriend is raped by a psychotic killer leaving him to seek revenge.

Parked (limited release)
“Fred Daly returns to Ireland with nowhere to live but his car. Then dope-smoking 21-year-old Cathal parks beside him, and brightens up his lonely world. Encouraged by Cathal, Fred meets attractive music teacher Jules. Growing closer, these three outsiders are set on a course that will change their lives forever.” WARNING! The synopsis on the official website includes that most familiar of phrases, “forms an unlikely friendship”.

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