All I can think is that it is the final month of BlogalongaMuppets and still need to watch Muppets in Space before I can skip along to the cinema to see this latest instalment in the Muppet franchise, written by and starring Jason Segel with music from half of Flight of the Conchords. I can’t even begin to think about the plot, involving the Muppets reuniting to save their old theatre from an oil tycoon.
Valentine’s day is next week and so Hollywood has vomited up a good of fashioned romance for us all to avoid as we try to convince ourselves that being single is best, honest. Rachel McAdams is a woman suffering severe memory loss after waking from a coma and Channing Tatum is the husband who has to win her heart all over again. I feel sick.
In Alaska a town unites to try to save grey whales trapped by rapidly forming ice. [Insert joke about Sarah Palin or global warming, or a weak pun about Wales]
The Woman in Black
Danny Radcliffe (let’s see if that catches on) in his first post-Potter lead role. Pretty classic horror territory as a young lawyer discovers a vengeful ghost is terrorising villagers. Plenty of wandering dark houses waiting for things to jump out. The play nearly made me wet myself so this film has a lot to live up to.
A Dangerous Method (London only until 17th February)*
Sexy drama about the birth of psychoanalysis from proud parents Carl Jung (Michael Fassbender in his third film of the year. Third! I barely knew who he was last year.) and Sigmund Freud (Viggo “Aragorn” Mortensen). Keira Knightley is on hand to do a bit of an accent and get spanked, it’s enough to make me blush.
Ek Main Aur Ekk Tu (limited release)
Hindi comedy in which “a few drinks too many leads an uptight architect and quick-witted hairstylist to marry in Las Vegas. Can a mistake lead to friendship and love?” Yes, probably.
Girl Model (limited release)
A “thriller” documentary following “a complex supply chain between Siberia, Japan, and the U.S. within the modeling industry. The story is told through the eyes of the scouts, agencies and a 13 year-old model.” It all sounds a little creepy to me.
Casablanca (limited release)
For its 70th anniversary this classic film (you feel you should have seen so bought on DVD last week from HMV but now kind of want to see on the big screen if you can find anyone to go with you)** is back in selected cinemas.
American Evil (limited release)
Released in America way back in March 2008 we finally get to see Bradley Cooper in an odd-looking drama about a sinister priest and dodgy activities in a Native American boarding school. What a poster!
*Confession: It is late on Thursday and I’ve only just realised that A Dangerous Method actually only comes out in London for the first week. By this point I am too lazy to Photoshop Kermit’s mug into another film still, so let’s all pretend that the film is out today. It’s what Fassbender would want.